Friday, September 30, 2011

September 30th, 2011

I heard something quite amusing this past week.

Apparently, there's a rumor going around that my blog has been shut down due to police investigation.

While I have no idea if the police are interested in my blog, it is definitely still up and running.  :)


It has been a busy summer, and now that my two oldest have started grade 1 life has again changed for me as a mom.

I am currently part of a moms' group here at our church, and this morning we had a guest speaker come in and talk to us about what GOD wants for our children and their futures.
She said that even though we may see a natural talent in our child, want them to follow in our footsteps, or even change what WE may think is a bad personality trait, how we 'train' or talk to our child has a huge impact on his/her future.

I was immediately brought back to the time when I was about 9 years old and my fathers' church held a missions conference.
There were some missionaries on their way to Kenya, Africa and I felt such a burden for those little kids in the poor areas.
I remember going forward and surrendering my life to the mission field of Africa. I also had a massive love for science and pretty-much all things that had to do with nature, dirt, animals, medicine, (oh yeah, I could go on and on) 
So I decided that not only would I be a missionary to Africa, I would be a missionary DOCTOR to Africa!

I remember seeing my parents on several occasions, bragging to people that were passing through or just some of the new people that they were getting to know, that their oldest child was going to be a missionary doctor to Africa.
I could always hear the great pride in my moms' voice as she would talk to her friends about my 'calling'.

I can't remember the exact year that it was, but I do remember finding out that in order to become a doctor you had to 'endure' at least 7 years of college/university....I remember looking at my mom and saying, "NO WAY!!!"
That was just too much schooling for this girl!
I then decided that I would become a nurse. There was a hospital that had a two year nursing course, so I thought that it would be perfect for me.

As the years went on, the desire and 'calling' didn't seem nearly as strong or clear to me. Yes, I had compassion for the children and families in war torn areas of Africa, but the desire and longing to go and help felt like it was fading away.

I know that my mom is still extremely disappointed in me because of my decision to not become a missionary in a foreign field.
But I am quite a stubborn/strong-willed individual (in case you all haven't noticed), and I believe that God did give me that desire and calling in my life as a child to keep me focused on something that was totally God centered.

I NEEDED something like that to stay on the  'straight and narrow' as they call it. God knew that, as He knows all His children inside and out.

a lot
No one else could get a person through such hard times and trials as I and others have had to endure at the hands of my own flesh and blood.

Proverbs 22:6
    Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old he will not depart from it.

For quite some time now, I have viewed that verse differently. Not just because of my own life experiences but also because of how I look at my Beautifuls.(that's what I call my daughters)

When we look at that verse and see that it says 'the way he should go', I believe that too many of us parents are the ones deciding what the 'way' is for our children's' lives.

How do we as mere human beings know what GOD'S plan is for our children??

I've told a few friends of this particular story, but now I'll fill you in too. I believe that it may help some of the mothers out there. ('cause I know it helped me)

I would envision us getting into a car accident of some sort, and not being able to escape, etc.

Then one morning as I was heading home from milking at a dairy farm, it hit me... Who was I to be so concerned with these crazy fears of mine, when they're not my children...They're GOD'S!
I had to pull the car over because I started to cry so much.
I was supposed to care, nurture, and protect my beautifuls, but it wasn't any of my business to concern myself with the things that were out of my control.

I (for some reason) was blessed enough by God Himself to give me these three little lives to raise for Him.
To do whatever HE wants them to.

Even those little babies that God has seen fit to take back to Himself were blessings to the parents for the short time they were here.

I love my daughters SO MUCH, but it would be bad for them if I were to concern myself with earthly desires that I may have for their lives/futures.

All THREE of my beautifuls are strong-willed and stubborn. (JUST LIKE ME!!)
But I can also say, from personal experience, that being strong-willed and stubborn can give amazing results when aimed in the direction that God has given.

Have I slipped along the way?  Oh yeah!  But God is merciful, and gracious, and...believe it or not....He loves us more than any love you can or will experience here on earth.

Though my girls may not (probably won't) always do what I think is the right thing to do, I hope that I can be a guiding and strong influence in their lives so that they can look at their mom and her life and say, 'I want to be like my mom and serve God!'


  1. John and Heather DyckSeptember 30, 2011 at 7:51 AM

    Oh Laura........You are SO spot on. John and i have tried to raise our children in exactly that way. Raising them as Gods children who He blessed us with the privilege of raising. Your above comment is "EXACTLY" what God expects of us as parents. We also have two VERY "determined" girls LOL and although, just like we as parents fail at times, our children have also, but we, as their God given parents stand right there, help them up, and stand beside them "ALL THE TIME" (not just when we think they have done something right). The reason? Because God will never stop helping us up as parents and never has and never will!!! THANKYOU Laura for setting a lot of the nonsense floating around straight. They are Gods children and God wants us to direct them and guide them and all we as parents can do after that is pray for them and be the Godly examples He wants us to be. thankyou laura

  2. Laura, although you and your children had to miss out at the gatherings of your parents and siblings, they are by far missing out on more. Since you would be willing to accept them the way they are and still get together becaue you are family, it shows that they are the ones who hold unforgiveness in their hearts since they won't do the same. I don't think that there is a holiday gone by where at least your mom won't be thinking of you and of how she is missing out on your kids' lives, but for the sake of peace she let's it be. Just know this Thanksgiving season, that the Lord sees your pain and He will be your avenger. He will repay. Just keep waiting on the Lord and he will direct our path. Wishing you a good thanksgiving, Laura.

  3. It seems like a part of your above posting is missing, Laura, or is your story complete?

  4. Laura,

    I think you don't possibly know what your mother feels about you going to Africa because you haven't discussed this with her lately, and at that time she was going by what you said. I'm positive she is not so unwise as to not realize things change. Only one of the children is a missionary as such and she is proud of each one... hey...even a sewer truck driver! :)

    To the above commenter, it's more than simply attending a gathering with differences of opinion, true enough, that happens all the time in families.

    A serious breech of trust has happened, and it must be resolved. I personally could not sit and pretend in a room with my daughter knowing she has considered me a monsterous abuser and tells the whole world this.

    Small talk and overlooking things has its place, and this is not one of those situations.

    Laura, I encourage you to meet with them and discuss the truth of these matters.

  5. John and Heather DyckOctober 13, 2011 at 6:02 PM

    TO: anonymous 3:02 i think you need to read Lauras blog from the beginning. She and her husband have tried to (unsuccessfuly) rectify things with the Sullivant family. Maybe read the whole blog before you speak.

  6. I agree with John and Heather Dyck in that if anyone has read all of Laura's blogs, you would know that she had tried, as has Jason, to reconcile with her family to no avail. May the Lord convict her dad so that he too will someday soon realize that he must take the next step to make amends.