Friday, May 31, 2019

To My Baby Sister On Her Wedding Day (June 1, 2019)

I guess that I thought that I would have been able to share this day with you regardless of our father, but that's okay, I do understand.

Since I have no way of sending you a private email, I decided to write to you here.


Although you probably don't remember me, you still hold a special place in my heart.
All of those time when you would beg to sleep with me to have a 'slumber party' (you would have been about 3 or 4 at the time), I remember looking at you sleeping and hoping and praying that I would never forget those moments.
I never forgot.

I want you to know how much I love you, and I want you to be happy no matter what choices you make.
I know that you only know of me by what you hear from my haters, but that's okay.
If you need me for any reason, don't be afraid to reach out.
I was, am, and will be here for you anytime, day or night.

God has provided so much for me since I left, and I know that if you keep Him at the center of your life, you will be taken care of too.

So, my one and only baby sister and soon to be brother in law, I want to wish you many years of happiness and joy.

Julia, I miss you more than you could ever imagine.

Love Forever,


Saturday, March 10, 2018

March 10, 2018

These last couple of years have thrown some of the lowest of the lows in my life. I have wanted to scream at the top of my lungs about the injustices of this horrible world and tell them where it was they needed to go and how fast they need to go to get there.
While I would be completely justified in doing such a thing, it wouldn't be right.
There are so many well-meaning people who have and continue to advise me to be vindictive, to avenge all of the wrongs that I have been dealt by those in my life, and I just can't bring myself to do it.

Out of all the hatred that a person such as myself has had thrown at them in my nearly 38 years by so many...most of whom don't actually know me at all, (most of whom have been of the male variety), I just can't imagine how those individuals must feel deep inside.
To bully someone...To treat someone worse than you have ever been treated yourself....To hate someone simply because you can.
While I don't understand how these people can continue on with their lives as if their behavior has little or no consequences, it is they who will have to live with said consequences. Whether it be on this earth or after. And they can (and probably will) blame everyone else. I learned a long time ago, when I left my parents', that one should not regret walking away from those who bring sadness and destruction, those relationships that are toxic.

Throughout the last several years, one of the most difficult things that I am STILL having issues with learning, is to just know that God is going to provide our needs. I've done my share of panic, crying, asking 'why', and so many other typically human and understandable reactions when one is placed in the throes of financial instability. But every single time, God has provided for us...Literally!

Philippians 4:19
But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.
There are a couple of things that I notice about that verse...It says that 'God SHALL supply', not that He might or that He can, it says that He WILL!
Isn't that amazing?!?!
The second thing that I notice about this verse, is that He 'shall supply all your need', seriously, ALL, not some.
I'll let that sink in.....

Something that I still have to get a grip on however, is that what we think our needs are....They may not be what the Lord sees as an actual need in our lives.
I have had those feelings of disappointment over the fact that I am unable to buy my children something small or give them a special outing, or go on a date with my husband that involves more than just a coffee or ice cream cone.
I then have to take a step back and look, actually LOOK at the many incredible blessings that are a part of our lives.
  • I have four beautiful, healthy, smart children, I have a husband who loves the Lord and accepted my daughters as if they were his own flesh and blood ,we have a warm home, I have a select few friends who I like to refer to as family more often than not....The list goes on and on...

I mean really, when we get mad and/or frustrated at the short comings of our lives, what are we really saying?
That WE know better than God as to what we need in our lives?

Do I need to have my children cheerful and perfect 24/7? Well....that's definitely something that I want, but when my children fight with us or each other, it is teaching them that they have a voice, that they are individuals and they also learn boundaries and how to deal with other personalities. But respect and honor are still a must, that is never up for debate.

Do I need thousands of dollars in a bank account? Again, something that we want but not that we need.
God may be teaching us that we need to humble ourselves and rely on Him to supply our needs. Maybe we have to learn to ask God or others for help in such matters.

Now, if there are things that God has pointed out that need to be changed or improved upon within an aspect of your life, get off your butt and do what needs to be done!
Maybe some of the hardships you or I are experiencing in our lives are as a result of the consequences of our actions. (or they could be a result of someone else's actions...that happens too.)
Just don't be so proud as to ignore the inklings of what you need to do.

I am so thankful of the many blessings that the Lord has given me. This year we had a massive miracle that could only be explained as being 'a God thing'. I wish I could write about THAT one on here, but suffice it to say....My heart is overflowing with joy and thankfulness in the richness of God's mercy and caring for His children. My praise will never be enough.

I am no longer able to have the girls in our YouTube channel, I apologize for that however it is something out of my/our control. I am now thinking about different ways to continue on with it and would love to hear any suggestions from you, my faithful readers. Are there any other aspects of my life that you all would find interesting that I could put in YouTube form?
I enjoy writing, I just figured that maybe I could try the whole YouTube 'thing' and see what that is all about.

And remember, there's still a contact button here on the blog and you can also make comments on my YouTube.

Monday, November 27, 2017

We Are On YouTube! (November 27, 2017)

Well, due to the general busyness of our everyday lives here in our household, we have now taken the step to putting ourselves on YouTube.
Yeah, I know...Putting our lives in real-time video is going to be interesting to say the least!

Some of the videos may be a tad boring, or not your 'speed', but I thought that this would also be a way for my brothers and sister to be able to catch a glimpse of our lives.
So, to Michael, Mark, Matt, Jon, Nathan, Jeremy, and Julia; it's ok if you feel uncomfortable emailing/contacting me, this is now a way for you guys to be able to see your nieces and nephew as well as myself and my man James.

And not to worry, I will still try and blog every now and again but doing a Vlog is proving to be much simpler and quick. Because as I'm sure you all have already guessed, I tend to write LONG blog posts which takes up a large part of my day.

Thank you all for your continued prayers for our family, we have experienced some pretty big changes in our living situation but we know that God is still in control and He has ALWAYS kept us in His hands.

So here's to our YouTube Vlogging endeavor, boring or not, here we come!

* Friend Family * is our YouTube Channel

Check out the link to the left of my page

Have a beautiful November day!